While I almost always begin my day with prayer and only slightly less frequently do all my morning and scripture reading, meditating, more prayer and writing immediately after that, that process may not always look as spiritual and quiet time focused as one might imagine. Sometimes, especially when I have a rough night and or get up a little earlier than usual and my brain feels a little foggy or thick, I pause before doing my readings.
Most days like those I put on my Pandora, usually an instrumental station or instrumental shuffle, lean back in my chair, pray some more, meditate on the music and some scripture or an idea about God while trying to draw near to Him, drink my coffee and smoke my first pipe of the morning. Basically I chill with the Spirit until I am awake enough to really think. I do this so that I don't waste my reading time by just glossing over without being able to contemplate or retain much or anything that I am reading. But sometimes I will peruse social media. I used to tell myself that I looked through it to see if family or friend posted or tweeted something it would be good for me to see before my prayer time, such as a struggle or prayer request. And while I do that, I can now be honest enough with myself, and I guess you Dear Reader, to admit that's not the main reason, especially when it comes to Twitter.
The truth is that it is reading that doesn't matter much if I don't really think about and just scan as I slowly climb to brain functioning cruising altitude. And often, I will see a tweet that catches my attention and hits me like a booster, waking me up a little more quickly and making me think. It's like the old Arsenio Hall segment "Things That Make You Go Hmmm." I find that nugget, and then, more awake, I have something to meditate on and talk to Daddy about as I finish the coming conscious process before I do my readings. Often, this time with something someone tweeted grows into the day's
Moment. Such was the case this morning.
As I scanned Twitter trying to ignore the many sports related posts, which would only serve as distraction and take me on a path away from the direction I need to go in the mornings, and the political tweets, which, well, just no, way too early for that mess which definitely doesn't fall under the lovely, true and of a good report category for meditation, I came across a post by someone that I neither follow nor am followed by.
Amanda @a**********
God knows everything that's wrong with me and why it's wrong. Yet, when God talks about who I am, he says things such as: I am fearfully and wonderfully made in His image. I am sealed with His promise. I am redeemed. #ThursdayThoughts #YouAreEnough.
This caught my attention and served as a nitro boost to the neurons in my sluggish brain. I needed this reminder this morning without even realizing until I saw it. After the prison dreams I had last night, I needed that reminder that I am not who I say I am, not who society says I am, not who my past says I am,... you get the idea. I am who Daddy says I am, which is loved, forgiven, new and His child. Perhaps you need this reminder as well. I spent some time this morning thinking on the statement, praying, and thinking even more about the hashtags, which is where I had a little problem.
You may not have even noticed my issue. You may have been thinking more about #ThursdayThoughts and wondering if this was an older tweet. No, it was only minutes old when I read it. I write each
Moment a day in advance whenever possible in order to be able to take as much time as needed and not have to rush to finish in time for the morning posting. The problem I had was without the other, #YouAreEnough.
I read through the latest of tweets with the tag to make sure that I was understanding it the way most people were using it. I was, and I understand that reason behind it. I even agree with the goal to an extent. People from all walks of life feel like they can not be enough and do not measure up. The expectations to be more, do more, do and be better, are crushing people. #youareenough says "No - you are enough, you already are, and nothing that you can do will make you more 'enough.'"
It's a good idea, or sounds like it. Except it's not true. Oh, it's true that we have an innate understanding that we aren't enough, that we don't have it within us to be what we should be, good enough, perfect enough, holy enough, righteous enough. The two most common responses to that understanding are to try harder or to lower the standard. Trying harder will kill you and destroy your soul. That striving is the beast that makes religion so nasty and brought about Pharisees. But the opposite approach is just another side of the same coin. Lowering the bar and saying, "I don't need to be perfect because I'm good enough as I am" will also lead to misery. This is because deep down we know it isn't any more true than a participation trophy is the same as the champion trophy and because God doesn't grade on a curve.
Perhaps you feel I am making a big deal out of a little thing. It's just something to motivate people and help them not kill themselves trying to be something they are not and can't be. I am all for that goal, but what we tell ourselves to motivate us matters. You don't need to try to be something you're not, and I pray that you are able to release the bondage of perfection and the need to be good enough. It'll kill you. The truest part of #youareenough is that nothing you can do will make you more "enough."
The truth is that we are not enough, can't be enough, and so yes, we might as well stop trying to be. In fact we must stop trying to be. We have to release the works philosophy of I need to do more, be more, fix and save myself. But simply realizing that we are powerless to be truly and completely loving, good, and enough will not get us to that place of rightness that we instinctively know we are made to be and need to be. It's hopeless. As long as we remain responsible to attain and measure up.
But there is good news. It isn't really hopeless, because that place of hopelessness and need is the starting point to freedom and transformation. The good news is that while we can never be enough, #JesusIsEnough. The good news is that Daddy loves me and He loves you as we are, not as we should be, but He loves us enough not to leave us as we are.
He does indeed say that we are fearfully and wonderfully made in His image. He does declare that He has adopted us and made us His children whom He will never lose or discard or reject because He has sealed us with His Spirit. We have indeed been redeemed by the love and work of Jesus on the cross. We don't have to earn His love, attention and care. In fact we can't. He does indeed know us better than we know ourselves, every selfish and wrong thought, motive and deed, every failure, every rebellious moment, every broken bit. And still He loves us. There is nothing you have, can or will do that will make Daddy love you any less. But there is also nothing you can do to make Him love you more. He loved us enough to send Jesus. Jesus loved us enough to wrap Himself in flesh and die for us. The Spirit loved us enough to make His very home within us and do the work Himself to make us new and transform us inside out from the mess that can never be enough into the likeness of the Son, a beautiful, perfect, unique reflection of the love and glory of God.
He is enough. You can lay down the burden and stop trying. He is all you need. He loves you and accepts you as you are. You don't have to measure up or achieve anything, because He already did it. Perhaps #youareenough is not so much wrong as it is incomplete. #YouAreEnoughInHim.
Beware lest anyone cheat you through philosophy and empty deceit, according to the tradition of men, according to the basic principles of the world, and not according to Christ. For in Him dwells all the fullness of the Godhead bodily; and you are complete in Him, who is the head of all principality and power.
- Colossians 2:8-10
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