Before I go any further, if you don't watch the show, you will still be able to get the point. If you do watch the show but haven't seen the episode yet, you may wish to read this later, as there will be spoilers. If you watch the show and are caught up, then perhaps you saw what I saw. There are two important truths about human nature illustrated in the episode that have everything to do with success or failure in recovery.
First, a little background. The show takes place in the afterlife, hence the name, The Good Place. The idea is that a woman named Eleanor dies and is sent to the good place by mistake. Serious spoiler for those who may start the series later on Hulu or Netflix, but as season one wraps up, we find that the good place Eleanor is in is actually a disguised neighborhood in the bad place, and that all four of the main characters have been manipulated into serving as one another's torturers in a twisted, almost heavenly hell. In season two we see the tale turn to the characters trying to navigate the situation and even trying to escape to the good place. They make it before an impartial judge who tests them to see if they have become good people or if they are to be sent back to the bad place.
With that background understood, let's look at the first real truth. With everyone understanding the eternal consequences and the importance of what is happening all four struggle with their natures to do what is right and pass the single test, and three of the four fail. Even the one who passed almost failed and didn't pass because of being a good person but rather because she figured out how the test was being done and acted accordingly. That should be something that anyone in recovery or in bondage to an addiction or habitual sin can understand. It's that phenomena of knowing this is bad, this is destructive, this is even killing me and still finding ourselves opening the very door we need to keep closed. It's late night promise to self that I will not drink or drug tomorrow turning to I will not drink or drug as much in the morning light shown to be utter failure at the end of the day when life has not changed at all. Failure after failure. Knowing the consequences. Knowing the need to do and be differently, we can not, none of us, consistently choose right. We do not have the power.
After an argument is made that the test is unfair, the characters are returned to earth moments before their death and are spared to see if given the chance and nudged in the right direction they will be or become good people without being inspired to be good by the hope of escaping the bad place. We see Eleanor have her near death experience and undergo a desire to become a better person. In fact, she does. She curbs her selfishness and her unkindness towards others for six months. As this part is being shown, I said to Leah, they better kill her now before the high wears off. Sure enough, after time passes and her life doesn't get better just because she's being good, in fact in some ways it gets worse, she tires of the fight and wonders what is even the point? Her old nature returns and she becomes the same person she was.
I learned this truth myself before I even became an addict and an alcoholic. I went squirrel hunting at my grandfather's one day and got lost in the woods. Terrified and unable to find my way out, I began to bargain with God. If He would just help me, I would be good, followed by a list of things I would no longer do or that I would do. At the top of the list was that I would be a good big brother, stop being jealous of my little brother and stop fighting with him. A short while later, my grandfather, who had heard me yelling for help, came and led me from the woods. Grateful, I put my relief into action, spending the rest of the day with my brother, helping him with some project or another. I meant everything I had said. I wanted the things I said I would do, and I wanted to be the person I had promised God I would be. And I also don't think I lasted the weekend.
Will power, determination, relief at a second or hundredth chance, fear of death, none of these are sufficient for lasting and real change. It wears off. The urgency fades. The fight becomes too hard and tiring with too little reward. The pink cloud turns to a dingy grey on good days and black on bad ones. Before we know it, we are right back doing the things and being the person we hate and swore we would stop doing and being. It may be an hour, a day, a year or a decade, but sooner or later, we will look in the mirror and see the exact same person we thought we'd changed. We'll never be good enough to love unselfishly and do what's right and say no to our nature and temptation simply for love's sake and for the sake of righteousness. It just won't happen, because we are not capable of making it happen.
The good news is that we don't have to become good enough. We don't have to become strong enough or determined enough. What we can't do, God wants to do for us, if we will let Him. He is able in all the ways that we are not. He is good and loving enough for all of us. He is able to set us free and keep us free, and He will do it with delight, because He loves us as we are, not as we should be, but He loves us enough not to leave us the mess we are. We can stop trying to be good enough, since we never will be, and simply accept His love, help and provision. We can stop fighting the war against ourselves that we are doomed to loose and let Him have the victory and do the work of transforming us. We can be rid of self. We can love unselfishly. We can say no to the old bondage and keep saying no until it's not even a temptation anymore. We just can't do it ourselves. We need His help. The good news is He's offered it to us, and we don't have to earn it or deserve it or be good enough to pass the tests.
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