Unshackled Moments ~ September 5, 2018 ~ Don't Put On A Brave Face

I am a fan of the band Stryper and have been since The Yellow And Black Attack, so it saddened me to hear the news that after a seizure on stage, medical tests revealed two masses in his head. Oz is a Christian, and I believe he loves Jesus, but I have to imagine that he is wrestling with some doubt and the question. You know the question. Why? I have had my own battles, my own instances of impending doom and loss that made me question. Why God? Why this, why now, why isn't the God of the universe always the truly quick fix.

I saw the aftermath of a wreck yesterday that closed down traffic on one of Nacogdoches' busiest streets and required at least two ambulances. That's never good, and it's quite possible that someone involved or close to someone involved wondered why did this happen? One of the leading reasons for atheism is that question, if God is all loving and all powerful why isn't He blinking away all the pain and the suffering and evil in the world. Why are there serial killers and wars and why did that jerk just cut me off and then drive ten miles an hour under the speed limit?

I don't know all the answers to those questions anymore than anyone else, but I know that the plan is in place and all the heavy lifting was done when Jesus was lifted up on that cross. I know that His delay in ending it has something to do with wanting as many as will come into relationship with Him to do just that. I know that He loves us, even when life is going to hell in a hand basket. And I know that there are still times I ask why. And let's get really honest and admit the real question, the deeper question, why me?

When we ask why it often accompanied by a voice of condemnation. Shame on you for doubting. If you had more faith.... So we push away and try to pretend away the doubt. Wet try to con ourselves and others with spiritual and religious speech when we have no answer to the tough questions like why did my children die when Hitler lived? And while that instinct to pretend to trust, to fake it till you make it, may seem logical and natural, I believe it is the totally wrong approach.

God loves us, and He is more than able to handle and understand our questions, fear and doubt. When we push away the reality of how we feel, we aren't dealing with it. We ignore it until  the dam finally breaks and we are overwhelmed. Don't run from doubt. Don't flee the question. Stand and face it. Wrestling with doubt is different than pretending it doesn't exist. That latter is a lie, and God loves truth.

The book of Psalms is made up of questions and expressions of pain. Yes, there's tons of praise in there too, but a third of the book is people crying out why? How long? When will you help me Lord? Why does evil prosper and the righteous suffer? Allowing ourselves the honesty of the question can lead us into a deeper relationship with Him. It allows us to admit our fear and our confusion and our lack of understanding and seek the answer in Him, our strength and our comfort. When we can say Daddy I'm scared and I don't understand and I'm having trouble remembering that You love me ! I need You to show me Your love and give me an awareness of Your  care and presence so that I know I am not alone. That is when we can wrestle with it, lean on His understanding instead of ours and rise up in grace to say I know You love me and will work this for good, not my will but Yours. To put on a brave face and say we understand and aren't afraid puts a wall between us and the Spirit who longs to be our comfort and our answer. So when life beats us down and scares us half to death, let us run to Daddy honest about our fears and doubts so that we can find our assurance in His love.



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