I do not know why there is this difference, but I am sure that God keeps no one waiting unless He sees that it is good for him to wait.
- C. S. Lewis
I can't wait for Christmas. I can't wait for my step-daughter to live closer to us. I can't wait....well, for a lot of things. I am not the most patient person. I've gotten better. When I first began traveling the Recovery Road I was much more impatient. After years of instant gratification and quick fixes and refusing to feel anything I didn't want to feel, I felt pain. A lot of it. Emotional wounds I had numbed and drowned for decades began surfacing. Then there was the withdrawal and craving itself. I wanted the peace and comfort of long-term sobriety in an instant. Now that I have over 8 years clean and sober the obsession to quick fix my stress and struggles and pain away isn't an issue any more, but I still have times when I wish God would hurry up.
Hurry up and give me what I think I need. Hurry up and makes things easier. Hurry up and finish the restoration work. Hurry up with the healing already. I still get impatient. And I have learned that C.S. Lewis was right.
I don't know why one person gets immediately healed and gets to go walking and leaping and praising God while another must learn to worship from a wheel chair. I don't know why some people find healing and are at peace with all their past quickly while others still suffer the effects of PTSD and learn to praise in the panic and cry out even from the depths of dreams. But I know two things. I have the confident expectation we call hope first that Daddy loves and cares for me and that no matter how it may feel if I am quickly restored it is because it will bring me closer to Him, and if I am slowly restored it is for the same reason. The second thing I know is that full restoration, healing, peace, joy and comfort is coming for all of His children. Some of us may receive more of it on this side of eternity than others, but all of us will receive it in equal measure before all is said and done.
Daddy does indeed know best. He sees beyond what we can see and understand. While it may not always feel fair, when He chooses to make us wait it will be better for us to do so than if we didn't have to. No, it's not easy to be patient sometimes. We want our answer. We want restoration. We want the winds to cease after hearing Him say, "Peace be still." We don't want Paul's storm experience of feeling the ship break apart, grabbing onto the pieces to drift to shore and then be snake bit while trying to get warm and dry. But if we learn to trust Him, even the snake bites turn to glory (Acts 27:13 - 28:6).
Let us stop trying to rush God. Let us stop trying to make Him do for us our way on our time table. If we want the very best for us and for our relationship with Him and for His glory sometimes we will have to wait. So let us hurry up and wait upon the Lord.
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