It's like holding your breath. You can do it for a while. But it's not fun and before long it actually becomes painful. If you do manage to succeed long enough, you don't win and suddenly become able to go without air. You pass out. And if this happens in the wrong circumstances, such as under water, you drown. So basically, no matter how much you want to, no matter how determined you are, no matter how hard you try or even practice, you can't live and hold your breath until you no longer need to breathe.
You are powerless over the need for air, just as we are powerless over the reflex and nature to sin and to try to do things to make that sin not hurt as much. If we stop there, it's hopeless. It will always be hopeless. Trying harder doesn't help. It only makes us more miserable and sucks the joy out of living. Discipline is not the answer.
But there is hope, because we don't have to stop there. This is the time of year that we remember and celebrate the hope that was born when Jesus came and the Word put on His man suit. But why? Why did He come? He came to heal the brokenhearted and to set captives free. He came to give us the power to have life. Essentially to grow spiritual gills. We don't have to do what was always done before just because it is natural for us to do so. By the power of the Holy Spirit and through the work that Jesus did for us about three decades after that first Christmas, we have a hope that we never had before. We can say no. Grace isn't the freedom to sin. It is the power to finally have a choice.
In the rooms of recovery people often get upset if someone says they chose not to drink or drug today. But that is the power of freedom. Once I became an addict I no longer had a choice. It was always simply a matter of time. No matter how hard I tried I could not stop the relapse from coming nor determine how far it would go or how much damage would be done. Not only could I not stop once I started, I couldn't stop the starting part.
Now, if I pick up again I lose control. I become a slave again until I go through the process that makes us free. I learned that with my last relapse eight and a half years ago. But today I do have a choice. A choice I never had after the addiction was born. Today I am free to choose. It's not because of me, but because of the relationship with the One who has the power to set captives free. Today this isn't really even a struggle anymore, but there are other areas that are, such as how I act once I become angry.
The Bible talks about being angry and not sinning, and I'll be honest and say I'm not good at it at all. In fact, I'm so bad at it, that I try not to ever get comfortable in my anger. I try to release it and turn to Daddy for help as quickly as I can. For me, getting angry and not sinning is like drinking without getting drunk. Some people may be able to do it, but I don't even see the point. I don't have to stay a slave to anger any more than I had to stay a slave to drink and drug. Still, I am as hopeless at controlling my emotions as I am in controlling chemicals. I'm not hopeless though. The same Jesus that set me free from the one can set me free from the other.
I don't know what your issue is. It may not be anger or drink or drug. You know what it is. What I know is that it's not hopeless, regardless of how it may feel. You don't have to give up and just go with it because you're too tired to fight. You don't have to fight until you turn blue in the face and pass out. The hope is not in you or your ability. The hope is in relationship with the One who brought hope to the world through His birth and death and resurrection.
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