Be Still, and know that I am God.
- Psalm 46:10
My wife and I have been on vacation, which is why the last week of this ministry has been made up of Echos, Moments and messages released previously. We had a blessed and wonderful time on the much-needed getaway, although that's not to say there were no struggles, difficulties or dangers. For example, on the way home a tire began coming apart.
The tire began leaking air noticeably while we were in another state, but it didn't look too bad. Slow leaks don't worry me too much. Just keep an eye on the air pressure, keep adding air as needed and make a note of it if the leak becomes worse and needs to be dealt with immediately. The leak seemed to be getting a little worse, so I was watching the tire closely. The spare on the van is stored in such a way that it is basically unobtainable from the side of the road. On the way home, with proper air pressure after I stopped and filled it back to full, the source of the leak made itself known as a bubble began to rise and the tread tried to pull away from the tire. A blowout felt imminent, and as the bubble became worse, the ride grew more and more rough and nerve wracking. Fear set in. Getting stranded would really suck. But there, in that situation, I was able to relax and trust God.
I stayed pretty calm, even as the tire tread pulled away enough for the air to begin leaking quickly. The tire was going flat. But it didn't happen on the barren stretch of Hwy 79 as it could have. It happened within a hundred yards from a travel center. Thank you Lord. My first instinct was to chill out, listen to more of our audio book with Leah, maybe grab a bite to eat and wait for a time I would be sure church was over before calling my Dad and seeing if he could come rescue us. It would mean sitting a few hours, but it wasn't that horrible. Then the thought came that I could try some fix-a-flat. I did. It worked a little but not enough. Should I go back to waiting or try an additional can? We decided to try one more can. It worked. I had to drive back with hazard lights on, running at 40 mph because the tire rode too rough to go faster, but we made it the 60 miles home with no further incident. Even more of a blessing, the tire held the air overnight, and I was able to drive to the tire shop yesterday morning for a replacement.
God's provision was so evident there, and I was able to be still and hear that small voice that mentioned the fix-a-flat and trying another can and telling me it would be OK to leave the comfort and safety of the travel center for the stretches of highway and nothing in the way of help should we fail to reach the next towns without the tire coming apart. I wish I could say that I did that well in every situation. But I didn't, and I don't.
Another area of anxiety, that's a mild understatement, during the trip concerned my stepdaughter. She, her fiance, and a few mutual friends we know through her, all live on the east coast of Florida. As Leah and I sat hundreds of miles away, unable to do anything to help and supposedly relaxing and having fun, Hurricane Irma bore down on the States with Amanda's area in her cross hairs. Being still, quiet in spirit and mind, became much more difficult. This wasn't being stranded for a few hours with no serious harm done. This was someone special to us in harm's way.
Did you know that this is the exact type of situation that the verse from Psalm 46 is all about? The context of the often quoted be still, and know that I am God is in the middle of a passage about natural disasters and the horrors of war. It's not about when things get a tad hectic or a little scary get still. It's about when everything is out of control and overwhelming and calamity looms, be still.
Maybe I'm not alone in often taking the correlative part of knowing that God is God as an unspoken statement that if we get still and give God control that everything will be OK. But that isn't really what it's about, at least not in an earthly and material sense. There is a God, and we are not Him. We need to take off the God-suit, because it doesn't fit. There will be destruction and suffering in our lives that God doesn't quickly, or possibly ever remove. People died in the storm. Others lost everything, and not a single one of them was loved any less than my precious stepdaughter who came through it unscathed. But when calamity sets its sights on our lives, there is a way that leads to life, a deeper relationship with Daddy and brings Him glory, and a way that leads to death, even if we escape the disaster we feared.
Why be still? Because when we are running around trying to control and manage our lives and the impending doom we fear, we forget that we are not God. We do this and that to minimize the consequences and prepare and try to overcome the obstacles, but we stop relying on God in the process. We're too busy being busy. Now, I'm not saying when you see the difficulty coming at you like a hurricane that you shouldn't be responsible and make preparations. Of course you should. But when the fear and anxiety begin to build we need to to get still and rely on God. He is the one with the wisdom to know what action and reaction is best for us. I heard the still small voice say fix-a-flat, but I didn't hear anything but our, my wife and mine's, voices as we tried to figure out what would be best for Amanda to do and how we might help her. Every weather center we found said the same thing, that Irma was going to smash into the east coast near Miami.
I have a cousin on the west coast of Florida, near Tampa Bay. After Leah and I talked about it some, my cousin's place looked like it was close enough for Amanda to reach before the storm hit, despite the road congestion, and yet far enough away from landfall to protect from the worst. My cousin graciously said our stepdaughter and her fiance could go to her home and ride out the storm, and Leah made the offer to Amanda. Amanda didn't feel it would be any better than riding it our at her own home, and said she'd stay.
Hours later, the storm changed trajectory and targeted the west coast instead. I am thankful that my cousin and my friend on the west coast who took the hit are both OK. Still, in our best strategy to cope with the danger facing my wife's daughter, Leah and I nearly sent her right to the heart of the storm's destination. She remained much safer in the east at her own home.
When everything is going wrong, I may or may not be able to choose the best course of action, but God always can. I can be still and know that He is God or I can run around and attempt to fulfill His role myself. The key to knowing that there is indeed a God is getting still enough to find out. When we are so busy running our own lives, trying to manage them, making all the decisions and calling all the shots and then scrambling to do damage control when we choose wrong, we are the center of our own universe. We are taking the space reserved for the One who created the universe, which was never intended to be filled by the creation.
Stillness allows us to get out of the way. It reminds us that we are not the end all and be all, we are not the center and nothing revolves around us. It gives us the ability to get out of self, again, and let the One who is higher and greater and wiser than we are do the managing, shot-calling and decision making. I want to be like God, like His nature, loving and full of grace, but I do not want to be God. Trying to fill that role makes me crazy, even when my choices are the right ones. Trying to manage my life is like a child trying to handle all the responsibilities of the parent. Sure, there are some children forced into that situation and some do OK for a while, but the stress and damage it does is horrible and overwhelming. The kid isn't made to be the parent, to have to play that role and deal with the pressures and responsibilities that go with it. And surviving isn't thriving. No one ever looks at a child doing what an adult should be doing and says, they're better at life than an adult and should keep at it! No. They say this isn't right or healthy. This child needs help, and if the parent won't do it, then someone else needs to.
Likewise, regardless of our age, we are spiritual children, and we were never intended to be our own Daddy. We can not, in any way close to right and healthy, do what Daddy is supposed to do. The difference in the analogy is that Daddy isn't failing to do His part while we try to pick up His slack. Rather, we have refused to allow Him His proper place in our lives as we try to usurp His position. When we get still and stop trying to do it ourselves, we can see the hand of our loving Daddy at work doing what only He can do, whether things are going well, are a little off kilter, or even if calamity is coming.
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