Yesterday, I met with family and some strangers and some family that were strangers to say goodbye to my uncle who died Sunday afternoon. I didn't know my uncle as well as many of the people at the funeral knew Floyd P. Woodard. In fact, despite several years working on the family genealogy in the 90's I couldn't remember what the P was short for until this morning, and I'm not going to share it here since they didn't put it in the bulletin. For all I know Uncle Floyd hated his middle name.
See, I don't know. While I do have some very fond memories of Uncle Floyd, and I have heard some amazing and humorous stories about him from my father and my aunts and uncles, I didn't personally know as many of those quirky details that people remember fondly at funerals. He was almost 41 when I was born, making him nearly old enough to be my grandfather, which much to my 45 year old chagrin, made him always seem like an old man in my eyes no matter if I was 5, 25 or 45. I do know thanks to photos that I have something in common with him, that appears to be a genetic trait, that as far as I know I don't share with any one else in the family. It always made me feel uniquely connected to him.
But there is a different trait, that is not genetic, that I wish I had more in common with him, that I want to develop. You see, the general public might not know what the P. stood for, but those that knew my Uncle Floyd know what it might as well have stood for. P is for Prayer. Uncle Floyd was a man who prayed often and prayed well. He prayed for others in a way that made a difference in their lives. What an awesome legacy. When the cancer was beating the sleep out of him and it hurt too much to lie down, he would stand in front of the photos of his family hanging on the wall and pray for his wife, his children and their families, as well as his brothers and sisters and their families. Those friends and family who came to visit him could not leave without him praying for them, even if the purpose of the visit was to pray for him. He prayed like he lived, honestly and with a heart for others. What a legacy. What a thing to be known for. Not that he prayed long or loud or very religiously. I never experienced that or heard anyone say anything like that ever. It wasn't a showy, prideful religious prayer life, but a quietly assured discussion with someone he knew well who had the power to help his friends and family. It was the unshowy entreaties of a man who had the ear of the King using his closeness to the throne to gain aid for those he cared about.
What a great thing to desire, to be able to pray well. How awesome it would be to know how to pray. But wait, you're a preacher, you must have a great prayer life. I feel as though my prayer life is abysmal, to be open and honest about it. It usually starts with perjury and requests. Perjury? Yes, most days, except the ones I forget to pray at the start of at all, I pray and express my commitment and desire to walk with God that day, to surrender myself and my will completely to Him. I claim to be completely ready for Him to have all of me, good and bad, to do with as He pleases. That's how I start my day when I start with prayer, and I don't need Maury Povich to tell me that's a lie, because even as I make these promises I know that no matter how much I convince myself I mean them, two minutes after the prayer my mind is going to be on what I want to do that day, if it takes that long. Hence, the requests. I have to make petitions to the King for power I don't have. I need Him to make it possible for me to even try to do what I just committed to do. It's like going to your father and saying I love you and want to give to you, so I am going to give you a thousand dollars today to help and to bless you. Oh, by the way, could I borrow $999.99?
Then I pray for grace and wisdom for ministry and the ability to serve Him and write what He would have me write, say what He would have me say and do what He would have me do to spread the truth of His love, His power and His way of life. Then more requests because I can't cover that check either. I do pray for others that come to mind and or have requested prayer, but it's like 5 seconds a person as I pray something to the effect of Lord, You know what they need, meet the need and draw them closer in relationship with You. True intercessory prayer were I spend time making petitions of the King on behalf of others, not so much. And if I'm in pain I'm not praying for anyone but myself without some serious grace to ignore my own situation and see another's. And there are far too many forgive me prayers, help me prayers, because, as my second cousin pointed out yesterday, we are wretched and pitiful and can not walk with God without His grace.
Maybe your prayer life is as poor as mine. Maybe it's worse. Maybe it's as awesome as my Uncle Floyd's was. Regardless of where you sit on the prayer warrior scale, it could be better, right? I have a feeling Uncle Floyd didn't feel satisfied with his prayer life. We can always get closer to God and better at communicating with Him. Also, as encouragement for myself and perhaps you, there was a time my prayer life was totally non-existent, reduced to the occasional 911 please get me out of this difficulty I caused prayers. It may not be what it should be, but it's not what it was. The only way to get better is to do it.
It's like riding a bike. You can buy books, watch videos and listen to others explain it, but the only way to do it is to do it. We have to get out there and peddle through the wobbly off balance beginner stage until we can feel it, until we don't have to think about it. Just get on the bike, peddle, get up when you fall and do it again. Just pray and pray big. I'm pretty sure Uncle Floyd would assure us all that he didn't start as a man known for being able to pray well, that he had to stumble through the learning process as well, and I know that Jesus hears us, even when all we can say is God I love You, help me love You more. I believe You love me, help me believe it more. Help me. Help them. Thank you. Amen.
Today's Unshackled Echo was previously published on
April 15, 2016.
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