The fact is that most alcoholics, for reasons yet obscure, have lost the power of choice in drink. Our so-called will power becomes practically nonexistent. We are unable, at certain times, to bring into our consciousness with sufficient force the memory of the suffering and humiliation of even a week or a month ago. We are without defense against the first drink.
- from Chapter 2 of Alcoholics Anonymous (the Big Book)
Lost our power of choice in drink...or drugs, or gambling, or overeating, or overspending, or porn, or, or, or. Powerless. Defeated. Without defense. Does this not ring more loudly of an impending battle than a repair job? And what are the tools of battle? Weapons.
And please don't think that this paradigm is not in the mind of the follower of Jesus, a part of everyday Christian spirituality.
For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places.
- Ephesians 6:12
For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal but mighty in God for pulling down strongholds, casting down arguments and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ, and being ready to punish all disobedience when your obedience is fulfilled.
- 2 Corinthians 10:4-6
That is some serious war metaphor, and I am not for one minute implying or saying that it isn't true. There are times in recovery and in our relationship with Jesus that we are going to have to do battle, when we are going to have to use the tools or weapons of our spirituality, that God gives us because His power is mighty, to break down, pull down, raze and destroy those areas in our life that interfere with our relationship with God, which threaten our freedom and seek to reestablish the rein of self in servitude to our addictions and sin. We are going to need the sword of truth to defeat the lies in our heads that bring defeat and despair if they are not dealt with. We are going to have to battle those voices that tell us that one more time won't hurt or is a good idea, that we are worthless and don't deserve freedom and victory and therefore should just put our chains back on, and even the thing that exalts itself above the truth of God and says that this will be a battle that is never won and we will have to fight forever, or at least as long as we live.
We are going to have to fight from time to time, but that is not really what we are called to. We are pilgrims more than warriors. Pilgrims who from time to time must defend themselves, sure, but we are not forever marching into battle. We don't have to sleep ready to wake in an instant and start fighting. We can rest. We don't have to stay keyed up, pumped full of adrenaline, vigilant and ever mindful of the enemy. I sometimes believe we have embraced the soldier and war metaphor far more than it was ever intended.
Were we really called to fight? Jesus said die and follow. Die to self not fight against self. Follow me, journey where I lead. It's a walk with Jesus. There are far more times when Christian spirituality is called a walk than there are when it is called a fight. Even in secular recovery it is called the road to recovery and not the battlefield of recovery.
The truth is that the war is over. The battle has been won. The struggle against self, against sin, against addictions, and anything and everything else that would rise up against the relationship we have with God has been settled on the cross. We may have occasional skirmishes with pockets of resistance that don't accept their defeat, remnants of our fallen foe, but the outcome is settled. We were not called in or drafted into a battle for freedom. This isn't Braveheart, and the Savior doesn't need our help, doesn't need us to rally and set ourselves to fight or die for the freedom and life that He has promised us. No need to play the inspirational score nor give the stirring speech to encourage us to rush to engage the enemy. He stretched out His arms and said it's finished. It's complete. It's done.
Please understand that there will be times when it is indeed a struggle and a fight to keep the will surrendered and walk with God, when the siren of self rises up and calls us to reclaim the reign of our life and return to our captivity. I'm not saying to go through your spiritual life unarmed and unprepared. God gave us those mighty weapons of spiritual warfare for a reason. We do at times fight against darkness and evil and the things that would bring death and destruction and interference into our relationship and journey with Jesus. But that is not the normal, everyday life worth living that is life so abundant that we can give it away.
When we walk with the Lord, in the light of His truth and will, we don't need to worry about the enemy and our defenses. Our pilgrimage is protected by a Mighty Warrior who has complete power and authority over every danger we may encounter. We don't have to worry about our addiction doing push ups and getting stronger waiting to rise up and attack us again. We don't have to fear that we will be fighting the same fight over and over and over and over perpetually. We are not stuck in a loop of freedom, then struggling not to return to bondage, then freedom, struggle...... We are on a journey from captivity and slavery to the Promised Land. And while we may not yet have reached the place where there is nothing but peace, joy and love, where sorrow and suffering and struggle are no more, we are no longer slaves to self and sin and addiction. We have been set free, bought and redeemed in a battle on a hill called Golgotha.
Keep your eyes on Jesus. Walk with Him. Follow Him on the journey from the cursed land to the place where the curse is no more, and don't worry so much about the enemy. If we do what we are meant to do, which is focus on the Victor, respond to His call to stay on the path He has cleared, love Him enough to stay close to Him, and love others, helping to meet their needs, treat their wounds, break their chains and bring them onto the road to journey with you, no weapon of the enemy will be able to defeat you, because you will never be without defense. That defense is not your weapons or your tools or your knowledge or your spirituality. That defense is your King and Champion, Jesus.
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