Unshackled Moments ~ January 6 ~ Do I Need Recovery?

Do I need recovery? I mean I drink some, but it doesn't interfere with my relationships or employment. I don't even get drunk. I just like to have a drink with dinner or after work with a friend sometimes or while watching a game.

Yes, I believe you need recovery, but if you are being honest with yourself and others about the alcohol not being out of your control or interfering with life, causing destruction, etc., then it's not for the alcohol you need recovery. If you can control your drinking and still enjoy it, then you're most likely not an alcoholic. I tip my hat to you and hope you enjoy that cold beer during the playoff games this weekend. I am no prohibitionist. I simply am not able to do that without becoming a slave to the drink again. That's not your issue. But you have one.

Well, what about me? I don't drink or do any drugs, except caffeine. I don't overspend or blow money. I don't look at porn or have destructive sexual behavior or relationships. I don't gamble or smoke or overeat or anything that I have seen or heard of 12 step programs for. I'm not addicted to anything. So I guess I don't really need recovery, right?

Well, actually, no, not right. It's easier for some than others. If you've woken up a few times stinking of alcohol and puke in a jail after swearing it would never happen again, there's a pretty big clue there's a problem and you need help. If your dealer is telling you to slow your roll, you may have a drug problem. If you gambled away the house payment or ate an entire birthday cake in one sitting because you felt stressed or or or or. Some addictions and bondage have high and dangerous costs. They are easier to see. In fact, there must be some destructive aspects or it's not addiction, it's a good habit.

The Association of Addiction Medicine states the following as a short definition of addiction:

Addiction is a primary, chronic disease of brain reward, motivation, memory and related circuitry. Dysfunction in these circuits leads to characteristic biological, psychological, social and spiritual manifestations. This is reflected in an individual pathologically pursuing reward and/or relief by substance use and other behaviors.

Addiction is characterized by inability to consistently abstain, impairment in behavioral control, craving, diminished recognition of significant problems with one’s behaviors and interpersonal relationships, and a dysfunctional emotional response. Like other chronic diseases, addiction often involves cycles of relapse and remission. Without treatment or engagement in recovery activities, addiction is progressive and can result in disability or premature death.

This is addiction, it's also a pretty good description of our lives outside of relationship with God, all our lives. Yes, even the lives of those of you who don't gamble, smoke or chew or go with girls who do, even those of you who don't do anything anyone ever got divorced over, put in jail or the hospital because of, etc. Let's look at it a little closer.

Addiction is a primary, chronic disease of brain reward, motivation, memory and related circuitry. Dysfunction in these circuits leads to characteristic biological, psychological, social and spiritual manifestations.

First, couldn't we also state that the human existence is one with problems and issues that stem from selfishness and some vague idea or feeling that something is missing or wrong? We try to think our way through the problem and make ourselves feel better, more secure, significant to the world, etc. and try to do that mostly by way of memory, fantasy and elimination of pain/increase of pleasure reward motivation, Because of some basic problem with the world and human nature there are problems, conflict, breakdowns and pain in every area of life, physical, psychological, social, spiritual, emotional and more.

This is reflected in an individual pathologically pursuing reward and/or relief by substance use and other behaviors.

It may not have anything to do with substance abuse or substances at all, but that and other behaviors is telling. Who among us has not pursued reward and/or relief in life and allowed that pursuit, that inner drive and instinctual craving for something to control us and/or our behavior? In those quiet and honest moments, who can't acknowledge that they'd do almost anything, give anything, to feel significant, content, peace, joy, love, and/or worthy of existence?

Addiction is characterized by inability to consistently abstain,

Now is time to get honest with yourself. Whether you're in recovery or not, whether you are Christian or not, no matter your situation, is there anything in your life that you know isn't right, that you would be ashamed of if people knew, or that you've felt you should stop doing but you'll stop later at some more convenient time with that time always seeming to stay in some vague tomorrow land? Stopped and then fell into it again? Hate it but do it anyway? Know it's bad for you or troubles your conscience and yet you fear even trying to let it go because you are afraid life would be less enjoyable or comfortable or..... What about those things that used to make you feel shame and guilt but now don't trouble you at all? Any of those? Anything you want or feel you should abstain from but can't?

No? Really? So you're perfect? Oh, you're not perfect? If you can admit to not being perfect, there must be things you don't like about yourself but can't change, there must be things you do that you feel you shouldn't and/or things that you feel you should do that you don't.

impairment in behavioral control,

So issues not doing what you don't like about yourself or believe is below the standard of perfection or motivating yourself to do what would be best or right? Can you really control your own behavior? All of it, all of the time?

craving,

Is there something missing? Some feeling that there's got to be more to life than this? Is there a need to fill or meet that has you trying this and that and the other to feel contentment and whole?

diminished recognition of significant problems with one’s behaviors and interpersonal relationships,

Things that used to bother, grieve and shame you not so much today? Are there issues with behavior and relationships that are all or mostly everyone or someone else's fault. Are people always trying to control and change you when they are the ones with a problem?

and a dysfunctional emotional response.

Does any and all of this mess with your emotions and make you feel out of control and miserable if you ever allow yourself to get still and quiet enough to feel reality and life? Or do you simply stay distracted and busy and avoid such issues?

Like other chronic diseases, addiction often involves cycles of relapse and remission. Without treatment or engagement in recovery activities, addiction is progressive

Do you have times when you can, or almost can, manage your life and then, just when you are starting to feel better or secure it all starts falling apart again? Can you see that if things don't change that life will eventually deteriorate to the point of not being worth living?

and can result in disability or premature death.

Let me share a secret with you. You were never built to die. Every death is a premature death. We were created for life. Sin brings death and destruction into the world and life. And I don't care if it's felonious and dangerous sin, or some little issue most people wouldn't even call a problem. If it's outside the will of God and interfering with relationship with Him, it's producing death and destruction in your life. If you are using that person, place, thing, activity or behavior to meet a need that only God is capable of truly meeting, or if you can't stop doing whatever it is on your own power and stay stopped, then you are in bondage to that/those things. Whatever and all that you can not eliminate or produce on your own power that is on the list of less than right, less than perfect morally, mentally, emotionally and spiritually, that is making life less than it should be, is something that you need a power greater than yourself to eliminate or produce.

The truth is there is supposed to be more to life than this. There is something missing; It's relational. It's relationship with our Creator. And the path to that relationship that meets those inner needs and gives us a life worth living full of peace, joy and love brings recovery and restoration spiritually. And when the spirit recovers and is transformed, the rest begins to be changed into what it should be and what is best as well.  Spiritual recovery is life recovery. And if your life is less than perfect and you can't make it perfect then you are in need of recovery, and/or continued recovery.

If you are tired of trying to make your life perfect, or figuring out or finding what it is that's missing or is supposed to be better, if you are tired of everything that seems to work at first falling apart and failing, there is a solution, if you are sick of trying to maintain the illusion of control, the answer is in relationship with the One who was utterly broken so that you don't have to stay broken, so that you can be restored, so that you can recover and be set free,

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